NYPD Blue, Season 2, Episode 7, "Double Abandando" Story by Walon Green Teleplay by Ted Mann & Gardner Stern & Burton Armus Directed by Andy Wolk PLOT ONE: THE RETURN OF LITTLE NICKY A Puerto Rican boy is shot dead in the playground of the school across the street from the 15th Precinct. Nicky (the young hood Simone tried to rehabilitate last week) is caught trying to dump the murder weapon, but Simone is convinced Nicky is covering for one of his older friends. He convinces a reluctant witness to come forward, and Bruce, the older boy, confesses. PLOT TWO: AIDS AWARENESS PLOT Martinez and Lesniak investigate a shot fired at a man who they later find out is HIV-positive but is still sexually active - he's infected at least two other women, and his current girlfriend doesn't know he's positive. Lesniak tries to tell her, but she's so blindly devoted to him that she won't listen. However, she changes her mind later and when her test comes back positive, she gets a gun and kills her boyfriend. Sylvia is ordered to prosecute, but assures Martinez and Leniak that the sentence will be suspended (due to the woman's health status). PLOT THREE: DEAD FISH As part of his move-in "schedule" Andy has already brought his fish tank (and all his beloved saltwater tropicals) to Sylvia's apartment, but when one of her fuses blows, the tank filter shuts down and the fish die. Andy's very upset, and even takes out his frustration on Simone, claiming Bobby is dragging his feet on the murder investigation because he's friends with Nicky's mother. He eventually accepts it, and finds the silver lining in the situation - now he can buy certain fish that never would have coexisted with his former crop. PLOT FOUR: DOUBLE ABANDANDO Donna's voluptuous sister Dana is in the process of splitting with her husband and asks to move in with Donna and Greg (who has apparently been living with Donna since the divorce). Donna's reluctant; Dana has a history of stealing her boyfriends. True to form, she tries to put a move on Greg while Donna's out, but he resists, and Donna decides to give Dana the boot. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Well, if nothing else, "Double Abandando" deserves credit for giving everyone something to do - we even got to see Sylvia doing her job for once. However, there were definitely some weak spots. The Donna/Dana subplot was obviously thrown in there so we could see some gratuitous cleavage - the old "my sister/best-friend always steals my boyfriends" plot has been done to death on every TV show since the dawn of time. In addition, the plotline involving the schoolyard murder was once again brought down by Adam Hann-Byrd's terrible performance as Nicky. Not only did he never sound tough, he never even sounded like he was trying to be tough. However, Smits' performance was again first-rate - Simone is still trying to get his cop instincts back after his time as a chaufeur, and it showed. I still think he drifts a bit too perilously into John Kelly territory from time to time, but so does everybody. As for the AIDS storyline, my major gripe with it is that it didn't show us anything new about Martinez or Lesniak. What's interesting about watching the 15th Squad go through the job isn't in trying to figure out who did it or how they'll be caught, but in showing us different facets of the characters. For example, in the middle of the schoolyard murder investigation, we got to see further friction between Simone and Sipowicz, as well as seeing more of how Simone operates. One of my favorite cases of all time was last year when Sip helped the aging gay writer find his Oscar, because it was the first time we saw how far Sipowicz (who, up until then, had been nothing but an angry drunk) would go to help someone. In this case, Adrianne and James seemed very sympathetic to the plight of the three women involved, and very angry at the boyfriend, but that's to be expected - we know both of them are as moral as the rest of the cast. The closest we came was the bit where James was commenting on getting scratched (and therefore maybe putting himself at risk), but that was over too quickly to make an impact. As for the death of Andy's saltwater tropicals, what bothered me about it is that the writers are trying very hard to show us a "kinder, gentler" Andy, and I miss the old Sip. The bit where he and Simone had their man to man in the locker room and he apologized made Andy sound way too sensitive. The only person he's allowed to show that side to is Sylvia... :-) Oh, and, btw, is every episode going to end with a Sylvia/Andy scene? I know Bochco loves that gimmick (Furillo and Joyce on Hill Street and Kuzak and Van Owen on LA Law), but it's very predictable - no chance for a shock ending of any kind. Shorter takes: -Is it me or was Lesniak intentionally trying to screw up procedure when she searched the murderous girlfriend? She just reached into her coat pocket - without gloves on - and stuck the gun in her own coat pocket. Whatever happened to chain of evidence and making sure you can get fingerprints? After all, the other major crime of the show had to do with someone who was holding a murder weapon and claiming to be the killer, but who didn't do it. I think Lesniak did it intentionally because she didn't want the girlfriend to go to jail for what she did. -Speaking of that, this is now the second time on a TV cop show where a murderer who was suffering from HIV or AIDS was given a suspended sentence (the first time was on a Law & Order from a few years ago about an HIV-positive mercy killer). Does this really happen? And, if so, do other people with painful terminal diseases get off? I'm especially interested because the girlfriend is probably only HIV-positive, and, as Magic Johnson is showing, it can take a very long time before HIV turns into anything really serious. So you could have a confessed killer roaming around free for years because of the compassion of the system. On the other hand, this situation could almost be called a case of justifiable homicide.... -Did anyone notice that Dana was wearing the same robe Donna had on when she and Greg first did the deed last season? Do you think the sisters have the same robe or was she just wearing Donna's? -So now we know: Simone is "French-Portugese." However, I have a Portugese friend, and when he jokes about his ancestry, he refers to himself as a "Portagee" (as in "Kiss my Portagee ass two times."). I guess the writers wanted to make sure we understood Bobby's heritage. -Obvious new addition to the Drinking Game: If Sipowicz refers to John Kelly as "the other guy" you take a drink. If anyone actually refers to Our Hero (tm) by name, chug. -Best Sipowicz Moment of the Week: Simone tells him about the time all his pigeons died, and Andy says, "Yeah, this is a similar kind of thing," while he does a major eye-roll. -Anyone know where I can get one of those mustache combs Andy was using? -Line of the week: "She thinks a D-cup makes her God." I'm not even sure why, but I bust a gut when Dana said that. -Alan Sepinwall -sepinwal@mail.sas.upenn.edu RANDOM QUOTE: "I don't mean any disrespect. I just don't like people barkin' orders at me." "If I'm curt with you, it's because time is a factor. I think fast, I talk fast, and I need you guys to act fast if you want to get out of this. So pretty please, with sugar on top, clean the fuckin' car." -John Travolta & Harvey Keitel, "Pulp Fiction"